Awkward

Hi. I'm Challice and I'm awkward.

And I don't mean the awkward thing  that kids aim for these days. I mean, I babble. I say the wrong things at the worst times. I'm just awkward, but I'm working on it.

At my parent in-law's house I wasn't feeling too great. (I wish to permanently be healthy for the rest of this year *****<---- Magic... Oooooh.) I had just gotten done nursing Onyx to sleep. I stepped into the kitchen and my sister and mother in law were in there. Mom said "You don't look very good." I know it's silly because she was commenting on my health but for some reason it cut deeper. My award winning awkward response, "Oh I look gooOoOod!" I guess I was hoping to get a couple laughs or something because obviously I looked horrible. Sarcasm? I guess, I don't know. Her face turned serious and she changed the topic. I felt SO stupid and I do these things all  the time. 

I guess I said that because what they don't know is deep down, I don't feel like I am some hot babe or something. I have deep, dark mama circles under my eyes and since Onyx has been earth-side, I hardly even get to shower. I already knew I didn't "look very good" that day and even though she was commenting out of concern, it just hurt me. In turn I responded with a joke answer that is so incredibly not me because I thought, I dunno, they could read my mind? I thought we were all on the same page? I really don't think that at all. 

I wanted to hide.

In short, I am awkward. I babble. I try to impress people when I don't need too. I say stupid, insulting and careless things when I am nervous. It doesn't mean I am stupid, rude or careless. It means I haven't fully accepted that I need to be 100% myself around others because when I am, it always turns out okay. I want to be raw, I want to be open. I don't want to be a social chameleon. I want everyone who knows me to know the same person. I want to openly love God and Jesus and not care what people think about me. I want to sing and not worry that somebody thinks I am awful. I want to live where I live and do what I do free from worries of judgement. I want to openly be me.

And I am working on it.

Romans 12:6-7 

Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; if service, in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching.

Growth and Babbles

Either Onyx is a math wizard or... Onyx must be a math and  word wizard.

Here's why:

Teething = Going on walks

Fighting sleep = Going on walks

Restless/Boredom = Going on walks

Staring out a window flailing his woobley arms = You can pretty much guess. 

The only thing walks can't do is feed him, or we would live outside. Maybe in a tent with some crackers and fruit snacks. (I think I am having a summer prediction! ;) )

All his different problems have the same answer? This is why I stayed in basic math through out school. How does that make sense? I don't know, but I am liking this whole "Knowing-the-answer-to-all-your-problems" thing.

I am a constant note leaver. It's like I can't even help it! Jared was still sleeping and I didn't want him to think  we went somewhere really super awesomely awesome without him. (Sleeping in passed noon? Luuucky.)

It freaks me out just a bit to see that I am growing older. When I was a kid my mom told me she still had the same brain she did as a kid, she still felt  like a kid or a teen but her body had gotten older. It blew my mind. Back then I thought a 20 year old was -old- I mean like, OLD. I guess at 22 my child self would have thought I was ancient. Speaking of,  I saw my first grade teacher Mrs. Wallquest recently. She was about 65 I'm guessing. In the first grade I already thought she was well over 90.

Reality. It's weird.

We become better friends everyday. 

He is learning to trust me more and test all my boundaries. 

Whether it be the plants, animals, people or hearts... 

Growth is a beautiful thing. 

 We got back inside and played peek-a-boo in the stroller for a bit...

Somebody was feeling much better. I think we are all a little happier since the sun has come out. 

For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; ...

Ecclesiastes 3:1-22

What Did I Do Today?

How am I exhausted if I hardly got anything done?

 I'll give you a hint. He's teething, emotional, and currently a total mama's boy.

So we just played all day today. 

 There is so much laundry to be done. I really ought to get gardening. The pantry needs to be organized, and not just for me. Jared pointed out that the tea and Captain Crunch are the only things easily accessible.  Hmmm tea and cereal? Not me. I didn't do that. Nope ;)

 We decided we looked better without glasses.  >Big< decisions, you know.

 We talked a lot. Or I mostly listened as he told me the woes of teething.

 We had a good day.

A Bit About Morel

Spring's mushroom hunting season is here! It's probably Jared favorite season, right after Autumn's season which hauls in way WAAAAY more mushrooms. Something you ought to know about our family if you didn't already, is that this is a HUGE thing for us. It first started with Jared and when I tagged along I thought "What am I getting myself into?"  Even though my passion for mushrooms is maybe 1/3rd of Jared's (He reads scientific mushroom growing books before bed. See? It's kinda his thing. )  What got me hooked was I am a better spotter than he is. Instant satisfaction I suppose. It's like a Christmas or Birthday tradition except we seem to be the only ones that celebrate it. (Which is all fine and dandy to us, don't touch our secret mushroom spots!) Being alone in the woods with the ferns blowing on the forest floor and the moss swaying from the trees is just spiritual man! 

I found these pictures of us last year with our mushroom hunting gear on. So much has changed.

These are HUGE stems from  morel mushrooms we found last year. Tasty tasty! (And lucky, lucky!)

Here is a triple headed mutant. Jared about went into shock. Think about how rare it is for something to have three heads! No matter, we left it and gathered up a bunch of his buddies to make dinner with.

To eat Early Spring Morels you just take the cap off.  Wash wash wash and we like to pan fry.

Bon appetit!

This might seem like a random photo but did you know Onyx's middle name is Morel?

To read more about our morel adventures you can click here ....or to learn more about what's the meaning behind Onyx's name you can click here to see my old blog Maps and Mer!

Sickies and The Secret Birthday Party

Part of me wishes it was all chicken noodle soup and bed rest at our house. Onyx and I are super sick, coughing, sneezing, aching... the whole shabang. A pretty sweet raspy voice came along with this cold and  my friend (who is also sick) agreed we should record an album right now. Isn't that the best time or something like that? Anyway, it was Jared's birthday weekend. Twenty-four years old on Saturday! :) I do love that man, but he is one of the hardest people ever to shop for because he really doesn't value material. (Good for the heart, bad for the holidays) So even though I was super sick I asked if he could take Onyx on a walk for about an hour so I could get some "secret" stuff done. I set up a tent in Onyx's room and here is some advice, never ever  move furniture when you are sick. It only makes you feel worse. I almost poked a hole in the wall with a tent pole (It filled up the ENTIRE bedroom) then I nearly poked my eye out with the other  pole.

But it was worth it. It looked pretty cool in the end. I thought Jared would catch on once the curtains in our bedroom went missing and the orange lights came off the ceiling. Nope. Men don't notice decorations at all apparently. If I came home and saw that I would have instantly thought we were robbed... He came in and out and hadn't a clue. Boys ;P

I planned that at midnight we would be eating pizza bagels and birthday cake in there but you know, babies.  I got Onyx settled back down as fast as I could and it was 12:04am! I don't even think we made our pizzas yet because Jared "wasn't hungry". (You were ruining my secret plans for you, boy!) Finally, I hurried Jared to the room and wished him a happy birthday. He thought the tent was pretty cool. I had to explain to him it would have been an outdoor surprise party, but I set the tent up outside and he came home from work and took it down because of the rain... Boo responsible man! You ruined my plan A! Hehe, that's okay though. I couldn't even say a word as he took it down. I couldn't spoil the surprise. He probably thought I was a nut for just randomly putting up tents outside on rainy days, but you never know with me ;)

In other news this guy ↑ had a tooth break out of his gums and another on the way. Teething and a cold must be miserable, but  he is a champion. I love that boy. Who knew being sick would be such a bonding time?

I thought I was on the "up end" of being sick and starting feeling pretty good so I baked a cake for my in-laws going off the theory that you are only contagious before you show any actual symptoms. However, I don't know if I really believe that. Either way, I thought I was done being sick so we made a carrot cake.

As it turned out I got a little too cocky and paid more attention to bebe than the measurements resulting in a very dry cake. The next morning I felt sicker than I did before, and I knew the cake dream had come to an end. I didn't want to get anyone else sick, plus it was dry as cardboard. Oh well, we owe Onyx's Grandpa a new cake. (It was his birthday too!)

So even though we are still sickies, Jared said it was a wonderful birthday weekend. 

That's all I wanted to hear.

Things will almost never go exactly as planned so I've learned to enjoy the unplanned just as much.

Happy birthday to my sweet-handsome-kind hearted husband. We love you man.

 Psalm 118:24 This is the day that the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Easter AT OUR HOUSE!

This was the first holiday at our house (meaning I played hostess!) and it was so exciting. I definitely want to have family over again. 

The house was decorated with Springy colors and it looked pretty  good!

I decided not to dress him until the very last minute. He's a super spitter-upper and that doesn't go too well with button down's and ties. So we found something else for him to do. He wanted to snuggle his best bud, Dorothy. He got his love for animals from this gal right down here ↓ It makes me so happy that he has an appreciation for animals this early on. That's my  baby. ❤

See that right there ^ The back of his head?

That is my most favorite thing in the whole world.

I haven't the slightest idea why, but I just love the fuzz off of it.

 When our dapper looking guests arrived we took a bizillion family pictures but you know how that goes. Somebody (usually me) has a blinky eye or somebody (usually Onyx) isn't looking anywhere near the camera. We are make quite the pair. Good thing Jared is always one good lookin' man. ;]

 There is only so much decorating you can do to the outside of a single wide house before it just looks like a crazy cat lady trailer house. Eeep! 

 It was really amazing to know with my whole side of the family sitting there, that Jesus died some 2000 years ago and was raised 3 days later just as the scriptures said he would. He showed himself to many people and then ascended back to heaven from which he came and when he met back with God the Father, his sacrifice paid for the sins of all man kind. A perfect man (Adam) ruined our chances of a forever life on paradise earth and because of his choice to sin, we die. There needed to be another perfect man to make an even sacrifice. So Jesus descended from heaven where he stood as the highest recognized being other than God himself, and was born of a virgin with God as his father and was fully human.  As a human he lived a perfect life undoing all that Adam had done, restoring balance to the earth. One day he will be king of the earth and God will show himself undeniably. Things will be set straight and we will once again be in a paradise in perfect harmony with God. Until then you can have a personal relationship with him in your heart until Jesus is King on earth and we can see them both face to face. Thank you Holy Spirit! 

We played some card games and used Onyx's toys on the ground for hats. My mom never remembered her turn and my brothers played video games I didn't even know we had. It was a good time for the family to be together. I love those guys. We hope you had a happy Easter too. ❤

A New Heaven and a New Earth

21 Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”^[a] for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. ² I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. ³ And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ⁴ ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’^[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

⁵ He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!” Then he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.”

⁶ He said to me: “It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To the thirsty I will give water without cost from the spring of the water of life. ⁷ Those who are victorious will inherit all this, and I will be their God and they will be my children. 

 What a loving God ❤

You can click here to see what we did last year for Easter on my old blog Maps and Mer!